Friday, December 02, 2005

So Many iPod Speaker Systems

Since it's that time of the year, we get a few new catalogs in the mail eveyday. The one that arrived the other afternoon that caught my eye was from The Sharper Image. The thing that grabbed my attention was all of the different speaker systems that are now available to dock your iPod into. And it's not just the volume of them but all of the different shapes they come in. It's kind of bizarre. here are a few:

This is the phallic option. You rest your iPod on the top of long slender rigid pole of speakers.

This is the disco option. Rest your iPod in this sucker and any drab dwelling instantly becomes Studio 54.

This is the 70's option. It comes with a 1'x1' square of shag carpeting and a DVD of Maude: Season 1.

This is the hipster barcalounger option. When you are a lazy fat fuck and a music junkie, this chair comes to you in a dream.

OK. I have to admit that I like listening to music when I'm in the shower. Plus, I drag my iPod speakers from room to room. So, this one isn't too bad.

This is the cool industrial bachelor pad option. Paint your walls slate, cover your countertops in stainless steel, plug your iPod into this system and prepare to impress the ladies.

This is the "I'm Having Trouble Telling My Friends That I'm Gay" option. Yes, that is a remote control with a wrist band that comes with it.

This is the militant dog lover option. Who the hell looked at that Japanese robotic dog and thought, "Boy what would be cool is if I could plug my iPod into that!"

Hey! That's the one I have. Of course, this option is completely cool. "The best!" as Lazlo Toth would say.

This is the big turd option. Plus, it has elements of the 70's option in there too.

This is the Rockwell "Somebody's Watching Me" option. Not recommended for the paranoid.


jds said...

How are there no comments here? That post was fantastic!

spinachdip said...

I'm pretty happy with my JBL On Stage - I guess it would be the "Life Preserver Option". I'm just pissed they added a remote to it recently.

Jim said...

So which one should I buy? Any recommendations?

Flatlander said...


The only one I've heard is the one that I have that I pointed out in the post. A friend bought a cheaper one from Radio Shack and it sounded really muddy. I like mine because the sound is clean and it folds up into something the size of a book. So, it's easy to travel with. The only downside to the one I have is that when I really crank it up, I get a rattle in the speakers. But as long as I'm cranking something that rocks and not a mellow acoustic diddy, it isn't noticable.

jds, glad you liked it. I haven't been geting many comments lately in general. Probably a combination of less provocative posts and the holiday season.